Bethany's laugh lounge

Sandi Rog: Umm . . . still in shock.

2011-12-30T15:08:00.000-08:00

Sandi Rog: Umm . . . still in shock.: I thought to title this post as a “praise report,” but I want God to be praised no matter what (whether in good times or bad). Wh...

12 Ways to Help a Grinch

2011-12-12T13:15:00.000-08:00

12. Give money to any charity in their name, and tell them about it.
11. Give them a card letting them know you made cookies, and knew that they would prefer they go to someone who appreciates them.
10. Sing Christmas songs off key...they really appreciate that.
9.    Give them your Christmas wish list.
8.    Introduce them to someone named Rudolph.
7.    Put some brandy in their egg nog - at least one shot.
6.    Always approach them while wearing a fun Christmas sweater.
5.    Read every card you receive aloud to them from your desk. Better call their extension and read it over the phone.
4.    Lay hands on their belly and pray that they feel the joy of Christmas.
3.    Tell your child that he/she is one of Santa's helpers.
2.    Better yet, have your child sit on his/her lap and recite their wish list.
1.    Scream "MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!" every time you see them and run the other way.

Best wishes for a delightful Christmas season!

A Super-Hero for the Season

2011-12-12T12:26:00.000-08:00

Listening to a news program (I won't mention 20/20s name) last night, I was not surprised to hear that super-hero movies did not fare well this year in the box office. Who exactly decides whether the box office is the authority in determining the best visual entertainment out there anyway?!

Then I thought about the "Green Lantern" DVD awaiting me which I had rented. Being among the many attempting to save money where ever I can, going to the movie theater to view a movie is a rare occurrence for me. The price of a ticket most likely ends up going into my gas tank instead. Enjoying a movie in the comfort of my own home, with popcorn fixed exactly the way I like it, a box of candy from the super market, and a cup of hot or cold chai, with the ability to pause the movie when bathroom breaks are necessary, etc. far out-ways spending such a ridiculous amount on a ticket at the theater. Except for when I actually go out on a date...so I have heard.

I also got to thinking about how the super-hero story tends to be redundant. Good always wins over evil, with maybe a cliffhanger leaving the option open for a sequel. Who needs the reminder of the power of goodness now-a-days? Isn't it always obvious in the tediousness of the daily grind? Being hit with one crisis, emergency, health challenge, family feud, tragedy...after another, isn't hope within grasp? Personally, I need the reminders.

God is good. He always has been, is, and will be. Even when the devastating events seem to overwhelm us. It is so hard to understand why He allows "bad" things to happen to "good" people, right? This question tends to hender relationships we so desparately need between ourselves and our Heavenly Father - whether we acknowlege it or not.

Thank God for forgiveness, grace and mercy! The hope that Jesus Christ, gives is what I celebrate this Christmas season. He is the super-hero who never fails.

I mourn with the many who lose and have lost loved ones, especially this time of year. My heart breaks for all those suffering. At the same time, I pray that the hope of knowing Jesus our Savior, The Prince of Peace, Our very own personal SUPER-HERO, resides in you who anguish. Lean on the Everlasting Arms, which give us strength in difficult times.

Those of us who are so blessed, remember to reach out to those who we know are struggling. I know how it feels when someone just holds my hand or gives a hug when I get caught up in sadness. Words are not always necessary. Love is.

Jesus came because of God's love for us - God is Love! Celebrate that love, and let His light shine in the darkness. Every dark corner we can reach should be lit up this season, in honor of Jesus' birth. May the peace that surpasses all understanding dwell in you this Christmas and throughout the New Year! Be blessed and bless another!

Oh, the sinus awareness of Autumn!!

2011-10-03T18:58:00.000-07:00

Where is your hope? What is "hope" anyway? Well, in short (not to be confused with what I've been wearing the past few days), according to Webster's dictionary it is "to cherish a desire with anticipation(or expectation)."

Autumn is here. It is hard to believe. The temperature highs here have been in the 80s so far this month. And I was looking forward to pulling my sweaters out sooner rather than later. My compression stockings are on standby. The warmth is not the only unusual occurence for me. I find myself a full-time student again, and am thrilled, maybe a tad overwhelmed. Overall, it is a fantastic opportunity. I guess the overwhelming portion stems from all of the other circumstances surrounding this so called life.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FlL8LayF0uw

Grief. What an unpleasant creature. It sneaks up at the most inconvenient times and ways. One solace is that many of those who have gone on, that I had the pleasure of knowing, have a secure eternity because of their faith in what Jesus Christ did for us all, and God's grace. In a place where there is no more sickness, pain, fear, or strife. These lives have caused me to take a closer look at my own. There will always be something missing. No matter what we do here on this planet, it will never completely satisfy our longings, desires, aspirations. There is always something more to attain, right? Can you imagine an existence in perfection? I cannot. Eternity. Be sure of where you will spend it, because though it may not exist in a time continuum, it's a long LONG something.

On a lighter note, my laptop is falling apart. I didn't think it was possible, but 'tis true. I have only had it for just over three years. It has served me well. I just hope it hangs in there until I do whatever is needed to safely store my precious files elsewhere. Unless a computer miracle occurs, I think I will stick to the paper and pen method of writing. Has that Charlie Brown special come out yet? It's a Computer Miracle, Charlie Brown!

Everyday lately, I have had "to do" lists in my head. As the sun sets, it seems as though I have not completed one single task. Do you ever have that kind of month? So here are some ideals I have to help with that sort of thing:

1. Stop planning on getting anything done.

2. Once my brain locks onto something that should get done, ignore it, and do something else.

3. Drink plenty of water.

4. When in doubt, crochet.

5. An ABSOLUTE must...read my Bible as soon as I wake up, before eating anything else. Praise the Lord all day long.

6. Keep life as simple as possible. No need to make it more complicated than it has to be. Living with chronic pain makes life a wild ride. Social comradre is almost non-existant for me outside of church activities. It becomes difficult to make plans, not knowing if my body can withstand all that I want to do. It can be a tumultuous and depressing existence. Futility indeed! I have no clue how anyone who has rejected God's Son, Jesus Christ, can cope with chronic pain. The Lord sustains me in powerful ways - Psalm 146 & 147.

7. LOVE.

7 simple things to keep my sanity. I will be adopting these tactics this month. The premise of this list is to keep in mind what is most important in life. I wonder if the word "list" is discussed anywhere in The Survivors Guide to Living, otherwise known as The Holy Bible? I know lists have more to do with law than GRACE. That is not to say that when things do need to get done, making a list can help us stay organized and see our progress...or is it? I think staying organized can be a part of living in Grace and staving off stress. Also, I believe that being a list person all the time can be a bit tedious. Take it easy every once in a while!!

Some thoughts on hope: Romans 5:1 - 5 says, "1 Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2 through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. 3 Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." (NIV)

We all have hope. What we do with that hope is key.

Life!! Can't Live Without It!

2011-08-13T13:16:00.000-07:00

Everything was going wrong and that feeling of imprisonment was rising up inside me, as if things were hopeless. Tears began to sting my eyes, threatening to spill and blur my vision. A field appeared. A field of sunflowers in bloom inundated my vision. It was in that exact moment in time, God sent something of beauty to remind me He is always right here with me. Omnipresent. I felt as though He pulled me onto His lap to hold me close. The warmth of His arms gave me such comfort, and His love enveloped me like my favorite afghan. I felt at peace. The worry subsided. He reminded me that He would supply all my needs (Psalm 23:1, Matt. 10:31, Phil. 4:19). Peace be still!

Then memories came to the front of mind. Memories of when God brought me through some other time of trouble, or life challenge. His promises are true. When worry sets in, where is our faith? Sometimes, we need to be reminded over and over again that truly, God is God. Even when we are rejecting Him, He is still God in our world. And He is still right there with you and me. When our faith is lacking, He is still faithful, loving and just. He does not remove us from our consequences. He is not punishing us when life gets rough. His love never changes.

So if you are experiencing some challenges of your own, as I am, I want to encourage you. Lean on Him. Go to Him. Yell for Him. Groan, if there are no words. He hears you. He knows. He just wants you to turn to Him and let Him show you what He can do. When we can't, He can.

Lamentations 3:21 - 23 says, "Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning: great is your faithfulness." Amen!

Fun fact Friday - Come on! Laugh!

2011-07-29T09:25:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite things to do lately, as a parent, is to say something that makes no sense whatsoever, and immediately leave the room. Now, I would not advise doing this while addressing an important matter. It is fun to just shake things up a bit every once in a while.

This morning, one of my lil' peeps asked me for some card stock (not an abnormal occurrence in my household). It was not intentional really, the way I responded. I think this is how I discovered this phenomena...not on purpose, but just a simple slip of the tongue. At my age, I have finally learned what it means to pick your battles. Trying to make the correction after a hysterical incident sometimes is pointless. To my perfectionist self I finally asked, "Why bother?!"

So, to the lil' one I sternly responded, "That's what you should be using your water for!" Instead of water, I meant to say "money," of course. But, as I left with the image of my other lil' one's face mentally photographed, it was enough. She stood at the sink, frozen with the dish rag in one hand, and a plate in the other. Her face was like one of those cartoons - stunned, mouth open. From the other room, I heard both girls snicker, one saying a shocked, "WHAT?!!" Priceless!

Just another reminder to remember to laugh each day - hopefully not at an inappropriate time, or at someone's expense, who is struggling. More doctors should be prescribing laughter. I actually was told by one doctor to stop laughing. Can you imagine? If you get a chance, Ken Davis has a great way of telling stories. You can listen to "Lighten Up with Ken Davis" week days, on a radio station in your area. Get your daily dose.

10 Ways to Control Access Online

2011-07-22T16:32:00.000-07:00

This week, there were several reports about a library district which has had complaints from parents about other adult patrons viewing pornography, which their children have been exposed to somehow. This is part of an issue that influenced me to really start training my kids on being careful what they consume into their bodies through the senses. Actually, this started years ago with the introduction of the song, "Oh Be Careful Little Eyes What You See." This habit, or focus, is so imperative as an adult Christian. It was not taught pervasively when I was younger, not becoming a fundament of living a Christian life. Of course, who knew way back in history, that the world would be wide opened to anyone who accesses the internet. In today's world, it is a prevalent teaching and thought that everyone should feel free to do whatever they wish, not thinking of consequences, and being tolerant of everyone else who chooses to press the limits of existence. This, unfortunately tends to incite folks on polar opposite ends of religious, political, philosophic, scientific, etc. ways of thinking and living to battle in ways which can be radical. Yet ethical lines are becoming blurry. So who is "right?"

So, we had a discussion about the differences in the library systems from when I was a kid, to today. Do you remember the smell of the wood drawers in the card catalogue? Wondering what a great job it must have been to type all of those cards and filing them in those wooden drawers with brass door pulls, which slid so smoothly in the perfectly chiseled drawer holes, and then, late,r in the disgusting metal file cabinets? I felt so independent as a kid, being able to look for the author or title in those card catalogues, and then finding the treasure between hard-covered containers with magical pages inside, easily on the library shelf. Who would have fathomed back then that there were more authors than Judy Blume, and book series such as Nancy Drew and the Hardy Boys?

Today, not only can you find book lists, but you can go to a computer (not invented way back when in the history of libraries... I'm just sayin'!) look up a topic, person, event even a T.V. show - even if it is on cable - at any age, and possibly watch episodes, AT ANY AGE. And the library cannot censor material for anyone who has a library card. ANYONE! Could this possibly be a little much for certain people, not just the children? I know it would be for me at a younger age, not knowing that I should possibly be careful not to let the temptation of "access" infiltrate my desire to stay focused on the God Whom I serve. So to you who read this, remember, it's not too late to limit or define what is okay to look for on the World Wide Web.

Here are 10 (ten) things I wish I had implemented, from the get-go, into my exposure on the computer. These are tactics - it can be a battlefield online. I will be adopting them for myself and my family. Feel free to repeat it, as written or modified, for your situation, occupation, etc.:

1. I will make a Mission Statement. It does not have to be fancy. Just something to remind me of what is important to me while I am on an adventure online. I will post it somewhere on, or near, my computer(s) and work spaces where I use my laptop. Here is an example: Our family mission online is to seeking God and Truth. To use online as a tool for learning, communicating and sharing while honoring Our Lord. Philippians 4: 4 - 18

2. Pray before turning on the computer. No it is not cheesy, especially when God strongly advises us to pray (Philippians 4:18). Sometimes I pray that my computer will work, which may be a little frivolous, but it is honestly on my mind sometimes. My laptop is falling apart - the monitor is hanging by a single hinge-thingy. My speakers stopped working last week. But that's beside the point. Also, pray for God's guidance and that He will open my eyes and mind to see more truth about Him, help me ignore the junk, and help me love others in my communication exchanged with associates, acquaintances, friends and family

3. It is okay to set a time limit to be online for myself and family members, especially for social networking. I will make an appointment for being online. Put it in the schedule. Then, before logging on, I will set the timer on the stove, get the egg timer, or set the one on my cell.

4. It is more than okay to say "NO" to things I know are not appropriate. Close a window before I have time to think about it, if something appears unrelated to what I want for my life.

5. REMEMBER: My presence online, I mean lack of it, is not going to be the end of the world. If someone who is important to me has something to say or ask, they can call me or text.

6. When in doubt, don't do it!!! Remember, there is no love in fear. Doubt is maybe a little more subtle of a word, but it is anxiety, which is fear.

7. Make a shopping list of things I want to learn more about, shop for, ads to place, etc., and bring the list to the computer when going online. It can save time.

8. When typing up something like an advertisement, article, blog - do it offline. Edit and proofread it offline. Then post it during your next online appointment. I really need to work on this one!! If you are anything like me, I need to read things aloud to make sure everything is fit for public access. Sometimes, reading it aloud again, after taking a break from it

9. As in most things in life, trust my instincts. If something does not feel right, it most likely is not. Flee from it!! This goes along with number 6 above. It is a good habit to be more careful about things.

10. Never, NEVER communicate online while overwhelmed with emotion. Pick up the phone and call someone you trust and know will advise you according to what your life ambition is, whether that be to be God's servant, or maybe in the best interest of living a productive life. I, as a parent, need to diligently discuss, and be available to communicate about things with which my kids interact online, and in this wide, open world we live. My kids came to me a few days ago, asking what something meant that a friend said. I explained, in an age appropriate way, what it was and why it was inappropriate. I thanked them for coming to me. There is no guarantee that I handled it perfectly for each of them, but I pray that they understood, without judging the friend, that they do not have to adopt certain things into their own way of living.

This mostly boils down to self-control. It is a muscle that I personally plan to exercise more. Remembering, though, that I need His power through the Holy Spirit, to help me. Prioritize. It is especially important to me to actually spend time with the people I love, and who love me well. That is a priority for me. Social networking can be fun, but it is important to remember that it is only a tool, not a relationship. Being able to access information on the internet so easily is wonderful, but do we really need to pursue all the information, images, videos, songs, etc. we pursue? I wonder if people felt the same way when the wheel was invented?

Be careful out there!

Happy Independence Day United States of America

2011-07-01T15:04:00.000-07:00

Freedom. Let freedom ring. What is freedom?

Webster's Collegiate Dictionary says that freedom is a noun, meaning "the state or quality of being free (sounds like one of my middle school definitions), especially, a)exemption or liberation from the control of some other person or some arbitrary power; liberty; independence b)exemption from arbitrary restrictions on a specified civil right; civil or political liberty c)exemption or immunity from a specified obligation, discomfort, etc. d)exemption or release from imprisonment e) a being able to act, move, use, etc. without hindrance or restraint f)a being able of itself to choose or determine action freely g)ease of movement or performance; facility h)a being free from the usual rules, patterns, etc. i) frankness or easiness of manner; sometimes, an excessive frankness or familiarity 2 a right or privilege"

So, just because we live here in the good 'ole U. S. of A., are we truly free? Is it truly free when we war to sustain this "freedom?" Is it free when there is sacrifice, maybe not from ourselves, but someone else lays down their life for me or you? Do you actually feel free?

Every morning when I awake, I am greeted with the awareness of excruciating pain. I have been in this state of being non-stop since early 2008. Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed by it. I feel shackled to it at times with no way of escape, except death. Yet, I know that I am free because of what Jesus the Christ did for me and you. He broke the shackles from sin that held me prisoner of eternal death/hell. I know hell will be ump-teenth times more excruciating than my current state, and that how I live in this current vehicle is SO temporary compared with eternity in the forever new model. I keep my eye on the prize. So I am free, redeemed by the blood and resurrection of Christ Jesus. There is always a price for freedom. And living as if that price has already been paid, is what God wants for us. Free from shame. Free from our own addictions. Free from haters. Free from anger. Free from the constraints of legalistic theology. All from accepting the gift of Jesus giving His life for ours. See Romans 6:15 - 23

Being free at a price, we still are servants. We choose whom we serve. Serving God is so much more freeing than serving the opposition. What are your thoughts?

Galatians 5:13 and 14, "13 You my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love. 14 The entire law is summed up in a single command: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'"

Follow me on Facebook or Twitter

2011-06-27T14:42:00.000-07:00

Photography by Bethany Williams

A panic attack ensued when I saw that I had over 100 friends on Facebook. How was I supposed to keep track of everything? Wouldn’t my brain explode with all that information scrolling down the “wall,” which I absorbed into my being? Wishing over 100 people “Happy Birthday” would take up so much time!!! How would I respond to all that these wonderful people had to say? Would this count toward my weekly word quota?

That week, I felt overwhelmed. Maybe I should only include friends with whom I currently have physically-present interactions, also conversing at least on a monthly basis. But there are many extended family members with whom I don’t converse on a regular basis at all. I want some kind of interaction with them, of course. I also felt a necessity to check in as often as possible, just to keep up with what details were being shared, or else I would be left way behind. Not knowing the context of everything going on would throw off the linear working of things. How does God do it?

Facebook is the primo way to keep in touch without actually having to touch. I don’t even have to have a conversation with these people. Why must I like and/or respond to anything anyone says on there? I don’t want any of my dear friends to feel ignored or alone. So I resorted to “like“-ing all the likable statements. That took the pressure off.

Then I spoke with some friends, and one of them commented on how he received a message (I still am not sure if they received it from face-to-face interaction or a note on Facebook) degrading his efforts to respond to everything that circle of friends said on Facebook, and he then stopped responding.

My friend number continued to grow.

At almost 200 friends, I had another anxiety reaction. Too much!!! Then, after hearing several opinions in regard to Facebook culture, I decided that my interaction was not necessarily necessary. It was not my responsibility to make sure others knew they were “heard.” I especially am sick of hearing that I am always on there, especially from folks not even on my friend list.

New Dancing Moon IV by Reven Marie Swanson * Photograph by Bethany Williams

So when I surpassed 300 friends, I finally had acquired some nuance about internet social networking. Early on I had determined that Facebook is just a tool, not to be confused with the God-given need to personally interact and love one another.

A great tool for submitting prayer requests and announcements to those not in my inner-circle, tiny as that might be. Posting scripture and quotes which inspire, encourage and provoke positive thoughts, is a fun way in which to use this tool. Oh, and one of my favorite uses is posting YouTube music and funny instances that might put a smile on at least one of my precious friend’s faces. What other things are Facebook, and other social networking avenues good for?

The Oprah Winfrey Show finale Partial Reaction

2011-05-25T16:55:00.000-07:00

I’m sitting here in front of my television. It’s 4:43 p.m. I decided about 10 minutes ago to turn on the Oprah Winfrey Show finale. She took a few minutes acknowledging Jesus as part of the reason why her show lasted 25 years. The other reason was her “team.” Ok, I'm glad I turned it on today.

To which God, she asked in anticipation of the critics and controversy, is she referring? What a blessing to hear a portion of her personal testimony and acknowledge which God she serves. The One with the capital “G,” or, she actually said something like The “G-O-D,” that everyone knows deep inside, no matter what they choose to do.

She recited some names and words which refer to the Biblical God - the Alpha and Omega, Omnipotent, Omni-present, etc.

The God who is the voice that is our conscience, the quiet whisper that can turn into a brick wall falling on our heads, if we try to ignore Him. How proud I am that she chose to acknowledge Him loud and clear.

I didn’t want to watch the finale show because I thought the focus would be much different. The same reason I chose to turn it off Monday and not to turn it on at all yesterday. Thank you, Jesus!

I know I have received countless insight, glimpses into many sociological and psychological, relational topics from watching her show over the years. Oprah Winfrey most assuredly is an Educator. She seems to be making a speech on how everyone should be going on after this show ends in a few minutes, for good. She incites everyone to heed the call and serve.

I love that she is telling viewers to go on in choosing to love, learn, validate (what a wonderful way to sum up the voices of even the hateful, murderous, ignorant fellow humans she has interviewed on her show!) and doing - ACTION. Doing what that small voice whispers to us, the instructions of what to do. Bringing things out into the light so we can deal with the things once hidden in darkness.

She just offered a personal email address to anyone to contact her. She said she would try to answer as many as she possibly can, personally. I can’t imagine that down to earth task she promises to attempt to keep at oprah@oprah.com.

She mentioned how she has offered a prayer of gratitude and delight before every show. It has been no coincidence that she got to be where and who she is today - she confesses that she believes her life to be a miracle. She felt so embraced on the show through the support of viewers. She says she was asked if this would be bitter-sweet, and her reply is that it all is sweet, no bitter.

“To God be the glory,” were her closing words on the show, then walked off the show, stopping several rows back to kiss and embrace her love, Stedman. As a Paul Simon song, “25 Years” played. Then the credits started to roll. Footage of her bidding people good-byes through the Harpo halls. Hugs and tears shared.

What a life! Just think, we have that capacity. The legacy we leave can be huge, if we let God work. Allowing God to be God can be an extraordinary exercise. Not so much when we choose to allow evil to use us as a vehicle, or do nothing at all.

Help me Name my Mannequin

2011-05-23T23:07:00.000-07:00

Place an order, follow my blog, then post a suggestion for a name for my mannequin. I will draw a name July 15, 2011 and announce the winner between July 17 and July 22, 2011. The winner will receive a SPECIAL, surprise gift. Tell your friends!! Purchase is necessary to enter this drawing. Only good for citizens of the United States. Contest subject to change, depending on certain variables to be determined by me. Thank you for your participation. Bon chance!

Also, the 100th follower of my blog will possibly receive a gift, depending on many things. Keepin' it real!

Ode to my G2x

2011-05-09T16:03:00.000-07:00

Ode to my G2x
By Bethany Williams

God created me to love Him and my fellow humans
So I can’t profess to love my new phone no less
However, I must confess
I feel strongly about my G2x.

It’s still a mystery
A marvel of invention
No idea what all it can do
This technical wonder, my G2x.

After 24 hours of being in my life
I already called to gripe
Can’t get online
One reason I requested my G2x.

Once the kinks are worked out
I may feel more strongly about
This amazing contraption! There’s no doubt,
I will master my G2x.

Copyright 2011

You made that?!!

2011-04-25T16:12:00.000-07:00

My grand-mother is the most amazing woman I know. Is it just a grand-mother thang, or was it just that my grand-mother, while I am/was growing up, both had the power to put the fear of God into me and then make me feel like I was resting in cotton candy every time she hugged me and kissed my forehead? Amazing woman!! She has done so much in her lifetime. It amazed me to learn that she hated picking cotton when she was a little girl in Mississippi. This woman who worked so hard!! But who WOULD like picking cotton in those times? When she told me that we would be sisters in Heaven, I was struck dumb. My heart stopped for a moment. Just to think of "my grandma" as my sister, blows my mind. She's my (she has over 30-something grand-children, and great(s) yet she's been "mine" since I could say it) GRANDMA! This amazing, beautiful enigma in human form. I LOVE HER!!

Anyway, she gardened, could find the perfect switch (or had the power to send me to find it), made the best corn bread and greens. Ok, my grandpa made the best corn bread, but don't tell her I said it. She could crochet and knit. In so many ways, I want to be like her. So, as a kid, I taught myself to knit and crochet.. My grandma is a wonderful, talented teacher. However, I could never keep up with her . She, and my mom are two women I could never keep up with. They literally move fast. And then, of course, as a kid I was so exasperated and exhausted when they would have to tell me to keep up several times, and then get annoyed with me because they had to say it more than once .

So, lately, I've been working on my skills, surprised to find that I could actually make, and somewhat design different items. I love using my creativity in this way!! What fun! Now, people have encouraged me to make them to sell. So I will do it here and rely on word of mouth. Contact me for more information. Follow this blog to receive updates. I will post some pics to show a little of what you can order. As I learn and try more, more pics will be posted.

Most of what I do make, comes from my heart of serving and gifting. Giving is an amazing gift for the giver, as well as the receiver, especially when a little love is in there somewhere. Gifts can produce smiles. They can result in tears of joy. Love and sharing is a powerful gift. I learned this from my grandma. Smile and enjoy!

Don't forget, Mother's Day is coming up May 8, 2011 this year. Get your order in to receive it in time to surprise the women in your life.

Spring Cleaning Again

2011-04-12T14:21:00.000-07:00

Spring cleaning time again. Actually, we are unofficially under the umbrella of cleaning, de-cluttering, and getting rid of things we do not need. This is an open task, especially with a not-so-organized pack-rat, such as myself.

A broken basket, where the rim along the top came off, attached to the handle. Every time I have attempted to move it, I thought I would eventually get around to repairing it. Just need some short nails and maybe some wood glue. This has not happened in two years, yet I think I would get to it soon. This week, I finally put it in the trash pile feeling pretty pleased with myself.

All the things I have held on to sit waiting for me to attend to them. Just as the clutter in my mind does. The grudges filed away awaiting attention. The bitterness collecting cobwebs in my head. The anger on the shelf. No better time than the present to take care of those things. I do not desire a dust cloud of all that in my mind any longer. Time to sweep that away, or when necessary, deal with all that before it explodes and crumbles at the most inconvenient time.

Forgiveness brings healing to the bearer, more lightness in existing, the light in the darkness of being wronged. Forgiveness does not make everything vanish that has ripped our hearts. It is the salve, Neosporin with pain relief, we apply onto our own wounds. It may take more than one application.

I sometimes am reminded of a wrong from way back when, and have to bring myself back to forgiving mode, whether the person is still in my life or not. It becomes part of my prayers, because I need God's power to help me forgive. Ezekiel 36:26 and 27 says, "26 I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. 27 And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws."

This passage reminds me how God can work in me. Though it was written for the Israelites way back in the day, it still holds true about what He can do today.

Spring signifies new birth, new beginnings. Rain washing away all the mud splatters from Winter. Planting, tending to our lawns and gardens. Being witness to lush green sprout from the earth, attracting other creatures we consider to be helpful and beautiful, along with the pest creatures. Flowers bloom adding bright colors to decorate the landscape. Animals give birth to their young.

Ahhhh!

We sigh at the wonder of God's creation when we choose to acknowledge it. I won't go into the whole allergy suffering, forest fires, flooding, tornadoes, I-forgot-the-sunscreen, etc. With the good, we accept the bad, or at least we have no choice but to accept the whole kit and caboodle. Even so, it is so much more bearable to focus on the wonderful things.

2 Corinthians 5:17 through 21 says,

"17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! 18 All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation.: 19 That God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men's sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. 20 We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God. 21 God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God."

Leave God out of it? Really? Is that possible?

2011-04-05T15:49:00.000-07:00

Something on Facebook got me thinking, and I just had to write about it.

So there was a recent poll on Facebook asking whether pollsters support same-sex marriage. Yesterday there was approximately a whopping 1,300 for and 30 against, with 13 needing more information. Today there are approximately 80,000 for, 3,900 against, and 740 needing more information.

What would some interpret this to mean? One might think that this proposition is supported by a majority of United States citizens, since nearly half of this countries' citizens are on Facebook.

This poll does not include a proper, melting pot sampling to represent an “even” sampling of society. If placed under an objective, candid microscope, this poll tells us that there is a group of folks who feel they should not rock the boat openly and publicly, showing love, inclusivity {Did I make up another word? So fun! Try it.}, and acceptance for everyone involved.

However, if this were an anonymous poll, the votes would be more authentic, with folks unabashedly voting the way their personal sense of morality and conscience leads.

I love and respect my homosexual family members and friends. You all may think I do not know, but I do. Though some think I am a goody-two-shoes, “religious” fanatic, I truly am a sinner, no better or worse than anyone, who has accepted God’s gracious gift of salvation through Jesus Christ, Who was given for everyone to receive, and accept. I do not understand this Grace completely, but am trying to gain knowledge more. Period. I do not adhere to any propaganda, religious or secular. I have, however, learned that the things expressed in the Holy Bible are not just words in a book. It is a phenomenon beyond all comprehension worth studying and excavating.

The propaganda which took hold in the 1990s, of teaching “tolerance” to children, so that moral differences are more acceptable to younger generations, is the downfall, creating moral chaos in our country. All for the cause of a ubiquitous definition of “FREEDOM” for all, outside of anything related to God. How does a society continue to stand when morals and ethics become less integrity infused?

The standards which held our country high, and as a society, the world wished to emulate, are crumbling and unraveling the very foundation our country stood firm upon. This is not merely an opinion, it is evident in the state of our economic, educational, social, corporate, etc. structures.

Inflation has exceeded what our budgets can handle, causing most middle class folks to pinch their pennies, spending less and opting for inexpensive products, no matter where they are manufactured or produced. How does this support our country? In this vain, how would same-sex marriage?

The threads are unraveling. Unity in this country is in the process of unraveling increasingly so. With the individualistic mindset of “taking care of me” or “gettin’ mine” first, does not lend much support to what is good for keeping the micro- or macro- community of the United States strong. With standards changing after every generation, the world becomes less beauty-evidenced, bestowing hopelessness to the multitudes.

Just look at Sodom, Gomorrah (interesting article at http://www.bbc.co.uk/history/ancient/cultures/sodom_gomorrah_01.shtml) Rome, the mighty Egypt, the English monarchy {uh-oh - yes, I know you Great Brits don‘t take them seriously any longer}…history repeats its self.

Anyway, with so much of our reflected standards on the line, people need to vote what they truly believe their conscience tells them. Even if your vote is not in proportion with what is popular, do not be afraid. The future of this country rests on it. And yes, we all have freedom of speech in the United States. Speak up! What are your thoughts?

A flower to brighten your day.

2011-03-21T21:50:00.000-07:00


Photograph taken by Bethany Williams	Copyrighted 2010

Feeling Springy

2011-03-21T20:52:00.000-07:00

Spring is here ! A wonderful time of year to begin anew. Get rid of all the junk! The clutter around the house, office, locker, and internally. Out with the junk and make room for more opportunities. If those opportunities don't come along, create your own.

Here are a few ideas to get those creative juices flowing in order to make your opportunity:

1. You know that thing you wanted to try when you were younger, or that thing you wanted to do when you finally grew up? Well, as long as it does not hurt you or others (even the people who will be part of your future), and honors God, get to it!!

2.   If you are anything like me, you collected a whole bunch of art supplies because you were going to learn more about...art. So here's the dilemma: should you take some classes and use those art supplies, donate those art supplies to a children's art program, and/or have a garage sale or put it all on eBay? Whatever you do, do something.

3.   If you didn't purchase all those art supplies, BUT you did make plans for learning about something else, you should still do something.

4. So you do not want to try anything new, you already visited every corner of the world you wanted to see, you have tried every recipe in that cook book, you took all the classes you want to take, etc., you may consider sharing your expertise with someone seeking out that very thing. For instance, become a tour guide in that place you once loved, give a class to some kids who need something to do, etc.

5. Start, or renew, your relationship with The Creator of everything. Seek out the beauty of that relationship and get to know Him more. Study everything you can about who He is and who He says you are. Learn about what He says love is and how much He adores you. Let Him woo you. Or just let Him speak to you, and pray pray pray. Don't forget to listen...it requires a stillness, a quietness, a peace that surpasses all understanding, which only He can give. This will be one I will be working on myself.

Paul says in Romans 12:2,
"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - his good, pleasing and perfect will."

Jesus says in John 15:9 - 14
"9 As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. 10 If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love. 11 I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. 12 My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command."

To me, this is what life is about - loving God and others. Being a friend to Jesus the Christ.

With the renewing of life in nature, the renewing of my resolve to love always requires action. Without love, there is no light, no life, nothing. Is love as precious as the air we breathe? We all crave it. I had a record when I was little and there was a song on it saying that in regard to joy, "...lots of folks don't even know it was made to give away-ay-ay." I think that giving away extends to love...gotta give it!!

Just as most children thrive in a loving home, so too does mankind, and we all make a difference in deciding to give love, or not. Now that opens up quite an opportunity!!

What do you do to celebrate Spring in your life?

Happy Valentine's Day, you mushy people!

2011-02-04T16:22:00.000-08:00

Thoughts have been rushing through my mind today (nothing new). Lots of funny 1-liners, or so I thought. Some traits and situations to attribute to characters in my fiction. Remember, as a kid, putting Elmer’s glue on your hand, letting it dry, then peeling it off? Would that have any age-defying affects if I used it on my face? I kept thinking that I should write them down, but none of them stuck for me to splat them on paper. The illusion of my cleverness is unproven at this time. But just you wait, you will be convinced someday.

While watching “Going the Distance,” I was so inspired to get back to my writing. Not that I would recommend it - I don't recall the rating, but I would rate it "R" due to all the premarital copulation, and use of swear words. However, one line from the movie was, “Just because I can hear you through the wall, does not mean I get to participate.” I giggled at hearing it, though the context was a little shady (the context made it even funnier, in a totally fictitious since).

Don’t we all observe? Do you ever actually observe something, then out of no where, engage yourself into another person’s life because of that observation? For example, you see someone is unaware that their shirt tag is out, and you tell them so. Or, toilet paper trails behind the shoe of some man in a suit, so you feel sorry for him and let him know about this possibly embarrassing predicament. I thought that line from “Going the Distance” was so funny and genius. Whenever I watch these romantic comedies, I feel like I am a voyeur, watching all these fictitious romances play out on a screen, almost convincing me that true love feeds the romantic system (which is almost as vital to life as the circulatory system).

What is it about romance? I try not to get my hopes up about Valentine’s Day, and being swept off my feet. But sometimes, I just cannot help myself. I had a boyfriend once who broke up with me on Valentine’s Day. Ouch!! And yet, I am still optimistic about that horrific day every year, carefully keeping my hopes in check.

“Julie and Julia” almost got me in tears. I watched it again, and felt this inadequate sensation throughout my being. I could barely walk, and wanted so badly to do as Julie did. Not the profanity part, just the part of finding something that would be a great goal, documenting the progress and going for it. The journey between the present and the point of reaching the goal would be what inspires, as well as entertains fellow humans. Uniting us. Encouraging us. Lifting us all onto some common higher level of being. Connecting us.

With all the social networks online, it is almost impossible to feel alone. I guess, if you do not take the laptop into the bathroom with you, you could possibly feel alone for a few minutes. But who does that? Actually, I guess with technological advances, a cell phone can do the trick anywhere.

This brings me to a thought I just remembered I had yesterday. The Body of Christ needs every member to engage. Facebook and Twitter, etc. do not count. Facebook, Twitter, etc., all are just tools in keeping us connected on a superficial level. Keeping us updated , praying, crying, and laughing. Actually, spending time together, authentically sharing the true details of our lives, comforting and loving one another with our presence, growing up in the Lord together, holding each other accountable, learning together, showing affection for one another, etc. are also important to our unification.

Ephesians 4:2 - 6
“2 Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. 3 Make every effort to keep the peace. 4There is one body and one Spirit - just as you were called to one hope when you were called - 5 one Lord, one faith, one baptism; 6one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.” NIV

What next?!!

2010-12-31T15:09:00.000-08:00

So, it is New Year's Eve already. Personally, the "resolution" thing seems like a set-up for failure. However, this year, in parenting, I have been encouraging my children to set goals. Goals for personal growth should be a high priority, in my thinking. Then I think of my kids and how they are growing physically, emotionally, mentally, cerebrally, intellectually, spiritually, without even trying. What an amazing gift, as a parent, to watch a child grow, and not only that, be excited about what is coming next.

Just this morning, I reminded one child about attitude. As I was talking, I was wondering about my own attitude lately. I encouraged her to go read her Bible or a devotional. She returned to my side with a smile and excitement. Coincidentally, the topic was "Consistency" in living what we believe about God. Who God wants us to be, shining that through our attitudes.

There have been countless incidences this past year where God has ministered to me through my children. I thank God for them!!

So, back to the goal of personal growth. I sometimes push myself to grow up more and more spiritually, thinking I can reach a higher standard. If I do this, this and this, maybe I will be a higher state of being somehow. I really don't think trying to grow works, now that I contemplate this. Just as a child cannot make themselves grow up, it just happens naturally. Growing up as an adult happens through experience, right? Spiritually speaking, I cannot force myself or think all these actions (things I do) will grow me up. That growth I seek can only come through the Holy Spirit.

John 14:15 - 18
Jesus said, "15 If you love me, you will obey what I command. 16 And I will ask the Father and he will give you another Counselor to be with you forever - 17 the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives and will be in you. 18 I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you." (NIV)

It is so hard to trust God at times, especially as a parent. Trusting that He loves me is a battle at times. What is there to love? So too, trusting that He has sent the Holy Spirit as Counselor and Comforter requires me to remember who God is and how He does not require me to be this legalistically-concerned agent, feeling that as a parent, I need to "make" my children understand the importance of going God's way. Though, He has required me to be a teacher and example, this growth cannot be forced down their throats, nor my own. His Holy Spirit continues to work in all His children. Speaking truth and love is pretty much where I need to focus. Resting in God - who He is and what He gives - brings peace.

My prayers are that God's love will prevail in us in the New Year. Being still enough, so His Holy Spirit will work in us and complete what we need in this spiritual exercise we call life. What a work-out that is...being still, I mean.

May God's love and peace reign in your New Year!! More love!!!! Happy New Year!

Merry Christmas!!!

2010-12-23T02:30:00.001-08:00

I was delighted to hear the checker at Walmart (don't tell anyone I was there) say "Merry Christmas" to me first this year. What made it even cooler was that she had a half sleeve unabashedly exposed, and the checker on the next aisle had some lovely body art too!! Have not seen any Salvation Army buckets thus far this season.

So I broke out my lovely "Merry Christmas" sweat shirt this year. It feels like I have the whole Christmas thing down. Christmas used to sneak up on me, and I felt woebegone when it came and went too quickly. This year, I wore my red velvet hat with the white snowball like puff on the tip, the first Saturday of the month. Everyone else at my house pretty much did most of the decorating so I could take some pictures, to document our first annual family decorating day. I may get a scrapbook page out of those. Broke out some ornamentation that I have never used, though it has been sitting in boxes, some longer than a decade. The Christmas music has been playing practically non-stop since Thanksgiving. Paula Deen's Pecan Rum Pie is sitting at the ready for Christmas day. The day is almost here, and I feel ready and satiated in the Christmas spirit.

One thing that has been a challenge is feeling that awe-struck wonder of what Jesus Christ means for the world. I have acknowledged it daily for the past couple weeks. I have thanked God for sending His Son, our Savior, to this planet. I even heard and accepted that the expression "Xmas" is not sacrilegious. That the X is not necessarily a deletion of Christ from "Christmas." In Greek, the "X" actually stands for "Chi," and was a symbol used for "Christ." I find that awesome to know!! Even when folks' motives are not necessarily God-honoring, God is in Christmas/Xmas. So with all the nonsensical objections to celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ, no one can stamp Him out.

Philippians 2: 8- 11
"8 And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death - even death on a cross! 9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every other name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father." (NIV)

Luke 1:30 - 33, 37 the angel Gabriel speaking to Mary
"30 But the angel said to her, "Do not be afraid, Mary, you have found favor with God. 31 You will be with child and give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name of Jesus. 32 He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, 33 and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever; his kingdom will never end.
37 For nothing is impossible with God."

Rejoice!! Rejoice!! Emmanuel (means God with us, or God is with us) has come to us, oh Israel." - John Mason Neale (Jesus birth prophesied in Isaiah 7:14 to Ahaz)

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!! PEACE ON EARTH! GOOD WILL TO MAN!! AND MAY EVERY DOG HAVE A REALLY NICE BONE NOT ATTACHED TO HUMANS!!

Thank You, my fellow humans!!

2010-12-01T18:39:00.001-08:00

Thank you. How do you feel when you hear those words? When I have working hard and trying to improve how I do things constantly, I feel a sense of relief hearing it. It is as though that person is acknowledging my existence. Those words are encouragement. They help me feel like I can continue because what I am doing matters to at least one other soul. Those simple words sometimes help me see my value on this gigantic spinning sphere we call "here."

Thanksgiving to me is a very important holiday. Four days are given to this occasion in the United States. I did not feel the love of Thanksgiving. I spent it with people I love and care about tremendously. The turkey and all the fixings were delicious. I definitely appreciated the time. Disappointment crept in, nonetheless, because I did not get to see all the people with whom I would have liked to spend time. There is one man I really missed, because when I am in his presence, and we do not have to exchange many words, but I feel this invisible cord between us because we are alike in so many ways. He exudes wisdom, though I have not always thought this. So does disappointment help balance thankfulness? The yin and yang of life's balance. We miss certain elements of life, we feel it in human form, but really, we miss the connection we could have with God had Adam and Eve made a different choice. The disappointment and searching we do to try and fill up those missing parts can only fill ultimately by surrendering to our Heavenly Daddy, God Almighty, and not by trying to get the best deals on Black Friday.

This is the lesson I have been settling in. I give thanks to God for all that I have, including His grace and mercy, and the gift of His Son, Jesus Christ. Though I feel pain, I rest in being thankful to Him. "...For He is good. His love endures forever."

Thanksgiving can be celebrated everyday, by encouraging those around us by saying "Thank you!" In that acknowledgment, we spread God's love and surrender to it.

Remember "Different Strokes"

2010-10-25T11:34:00.000-07:00

Just saw a clip of Morgan Freeman on “60 Minutes” talking about racism in the United States. First of all, why is there a Viagra ad when I look at this link? Don't they know who I am? Second, He does not want a Black History Month and doesn't think we need to talk about it. This will end racism, in his opinion. I see his point, and have often wished we lived in a society where skin color was more of a non-issue. But we don’t. So the phrase, "What you talkin' 'bout Willis?" comes to mind. As long as society feels the need to label people this way...White...Black...Purple...Hispanic... Asian... African... Indian... Ethiopian... Texan... racism will continue.

I cannot tell you how many times I have encountered situations where I wondered if my skin color was a factor in how I was treated,or someone reacted to me. Like the time In New Mexico at a hotel where the desk clerk told me I would make a great lightening rod, in response to me asking if the pool was open (I meant in general) and it was raining outside at that moment. What was that?!!! Yes, those feelings still lurk in the dark corners of our society. Racial profiling. We are all impacted by what we see. We can’t help but draw conclusions, sometimes subconsciously, based on our first visual perspective of someone, based on our experience, what we have heard, what we see on t.v. and what we have been taught in our family lives.

Then, I am so used to hearing about my skin color, sometimes from reading between the lines. “Oh. I had no idea you were black from our telephone conversation.” “You speak so well for an African American.” “Where are you from?” possibly meaning, “What kind of education did you have that makes you different than the African American people I have seen on t.v.?,(or) heard about in rap music?, (or) saw on the news?, etc.” There’s a tone I can hear when speaking with someone of a different ethnic background, that gives evidence that a preconceived notion has been applied to me, which really has nothing to do with who I am, except that my skin color matches that of someone from that person’s history.

Some feel this country was built on my ancestors, and all of the enslaved Africans and Native Americans forced into becoming citizens in this country. You hear about the “whites” who came here to pursue the “American Dream.” My ancestors most likely did not have a dream, but more of a nightmare when being chained to the ships that brought them here. Commemorating this, when it has been omitted from text books, American History, a taboo subject, is necessary in the beginnings of the healing process in our country.

I have no answers as to where my ancestors came from, their culture & traditions, names, dates, tombstones to visit, all due to the inhumane way they were treated - being treated as property. From that enslavement to now, we have been forced basically to conform to what is acceptable by “whites” in order to “fit” into a society that rejected us as humans, yet used our strengths to convert the Native Americans‘ land into what the “whites“ wanted. The feelings, the devaluation (did I just make up another word?), has been passed on from generation to generation, as has the hate and ignorance on the other side of the coin. Some blacks have trouble getting past the thumb of “the man.” Black History Month says to me, “your people” are of value to our country. Part of me wonders why "my people" does not encompass all the people I love...my peeps!! On the other hand, I appreciate this commemoration.

I love white people!! If I were to say that aloud, that would sound ridiculous and I would be rolling on the floor laughing, as those who know me might. Just for the record, I don't speak Ebonics, nor do I use the acronyms of our technology era (eg. ROFLMBO!!) Yes, I did get teased because I didn't curse as a kid, didn't use slang very well either. Just doesn't roll off my tongue very easily. Are there really white people that say, "I love black people!!" like Jerry Maguire? That brings me back to Morgan Freeman's thought. Why should we feel a need to say that? Shouldn't love be for all folks, no matter what factors make us different? What are your thoughts?

Storycrafter's Seminar with Susan May Warren

2010-10-23T23:15:00.000-07:00

Have you always wanted to write a story but didn’t know where to start? If so, the Storycrafter's Seminar is for you! RITA Award-winning author and writing coach Susan May Warren will teach you story structure, go step-by-step in the character creation and plotting process, then show you how to apply it to your story. She’ll brainstorm your idea, share essential secrets of storytelling, and finally, you'll take home a plan that will act as a map for your novel. With time for writing, as well as learning, it’s a day for writers of all levels that will jumpstart your novel onto the road to publication.

The Storycrafter's Seminar, Featuring Susan May Warren, RITA Award Winning Novelist and Writing Coach, will be held Saturday, November 13th, 2010, 8:30 am to 4 pm at Graystone Castle Event Center (formerly Radisson Graystone Castle), I-25 & 120th Avenue, in Thornton, Colorado. Registration check-in and continental breakfast begin at 8:30 am, seminar begins at 9.

Susan May Warren is the RITA award-winning author of twenty-five novels with Tyndale, Barbour and Steeple Hill. A RITA winner, as well as a four-time Christy award finalist, she’s also a multi-winner of the Inspirational Readers Choice award, and the ACFW Book of the Year. A seasoned women’s events speaker, she’s a popular writing teacher at conferences around the nation and the author of the beginning writer’s workbook: From the Inside-Out: discover, create and publish the novel in you! She is also the founder of www.MyBookTherapy.com, a story-crafting service that helps authors discover their voice. A full listing of her titles, reviews and awards can be found at www.susanmaywarren.com.

Cost is $109 and Registration ends November 1, 2010. The event will be held in Thornton, Colorado, 12 miles north of downtown Denver and 30 minutes from the airport, in the Graystone Castle Event Center (formerly Radisson Graystone Castle). Admission to the event includes:

* Storycrafter's workbook
* Continental breakfast
* Deli lunch buffet

Does anyone have a pen?

2010-09-07T18:05:00.000-07:00

Out of the gazillion pens we have around here, I can't find one that writes smoothly, sideways or upside down. Except the penCIL variety, of course. Those are reserved for game time, and the elementary students who seem to find at least one opportunity a week, on average, to scurry around complaining about not being able to find a pencil. That's pretty funny to me being that I see them on the floor when I choose to make a walk to {impossible to go through} their rooms.

Do I dare disregard my own resolve not to purchase any more pens until I am down to 25ish? Has there been such an advancement in the pen industry...a high-tech pen that even writes underwater?

Why is it that I tend to hoard certain items? Or maybe I should say "collect" things? I am that way with pens as well as note pads (paper in general...stationary, spiral note pads, even found some typewriter paper in a box in storage, etc.), perfume, beads, gift bags, kitchen gadgets, nail polish (still trying to find that perfect pink), fabric, Pez dispensers, painting and art supplies. I probably have more Bibles than the average person. Each one has a different purpose or meaning to me.

Hoarding is sometimes a symptom of trying to fill a void. It can become a compulsion {Yes, I have watched some of the shows...fascinating!}. I know in my head that only God can fill what is missing in my life, which all boils down to love. I know in my head, that God wants to be and should be all I need, my everything. But in real life, I can't feel His love. I suppose it isn't as real to me as I would like. And with that, I am not exactly trusting God.

In one of my Bibles I read Mark chapter 9, verses 21 through 29. This passage describes a life altering event occurred between Jesus the Christ and an anonymous dad with his son, and possibly everyone who saw what happened. The dad had brought his son to a gathering where some of the disciples were arguing with some teachers of the law. Jesus was pretty annoyed with the unbelief of some of the folks there. Kind of like I get annoyed when one of my older children bothers arguing with the youngest, expecting the youngest to grasp things the way they do. Was he annoyed because of the leaders' or the disciples' unbelief? Well, the dad wanted his son to be healed, but the disciples could not do it (verse 18). So, in Mark chapter 9, verses 21 through 29...

"21 Jesus asked the boy's father, 'How long has he been like this?'
'From childhood,' he answered. 22 'It has often thrown him into fire or water to kill him. But if* you can do anything, take pity on us, and help us.'
23 'If* you can'? said Jesus. 'Everything is possible for him who believes.'
24 Immediately the boy's father exclaimed, 'I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!'
25 When Jesus saw that a crowd was running to the scene, he rebuked the evil spirit. 'You deaf and mute spirit,' he said, 'I command you, come out of him and never enter him again.'"
26 The spirit shrieked, convulsed him violently and came out. The boy looked so much like a corpse that many said, 'He's dead.' 27 But Jesus took him by the hand and lifted him to his feet, and he stood up.
28 After Jesus had gone indoors, his disciples asked him privately, 'Why couldn't we drive it out?"
29 He replied, 'This kind can come out only by prayer.'" (NIV)

*emphasis mine

I am like that dad - believe, but struggle with my own faith. One amazing thing about faith is that God has never broken a promise - He remains faithful. His word has always been true.

I don't think Jesus is saying in verse 23 that we will get whatever we want by believing it will be so. Healing just because we believe, winning the lottery is possible through belief, etc. isn't what he is telling us to do {wouldn't that be nice, though?!}. A lot of people get stuck on, or in, that whole misconception. I think he is saying that we need to believe that God is who He says He is. We should know by now that God is capable of doing anything. Or what I mean is, we who have read or heard some of Biblical history have learned that God did what He said, and had to change things when mankind did not hold up our end of the bargain. He can do it. He has done it. We can't limit God, or put Him in a box, or tell Him who He should be (Have you ever watched "Bruce Almighty?").

And though sometimes in our own understanding or perception, we believe we are unworthy or whatever, we need to believe that God loves us and can use us to do some amazing things, sometimes outside of our comprehension. For instance, a smile can be life altering to the person to whom it is aimed. That smile could have the power to rejuvinate a person's grasp of goodness in this world.

Jesus, in John chapter 3 verses 16 and 17 says to Nicodemus, "16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal live. 17 For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him." That's a whole lot of love! I just need to rest in that love and stop shopping for more pens.

I am a writer, period.

2010-08-16T13:52:00.000-07:00

Last night I dreamed I ate a 10-pound marshmallow. When I woke up, the pillow was gone.
-Tommy Cooper

Do you ever feel blah? Just going along with life, wondering what is "it?" What will make life something more significant? Will God "call" me to do something dynamic, or am I destined to be just another life lived in blah? I really want to contribute something. It's been awesome to have people tell me that they appreciate me and feel encouraged by something I wrote, did or said, or even my smile. That in itself is great and warms my heart. Am I ever going to do or be someone where I am just exasperated and wonder at something which comes out of me that is truly magnificent, though?

A woman I met last year invited me to visit a writers' group. I went, and felt like a humbled sponge. Everything that was said I ate right up. The speakers were great! The camaraderie was moving. Then, when I thought of me, and how I haven't even finished writing anything but a few children's stories, some songs, poems, prose, and articles, I didn't think I belonged there. So one day, sitting at a coffee shop, listening to these wonderful, generous women who have adult fiction books published - which I, for some reason, consider more validly the definition of a writer - I felt like God wasn't quite calling me to be an official member of the group because of what I have done as a semi-writer, as if there is some hierarchy in this label. Guiltily, I accepted a box filled with resources to help one improve as a writer . I had no clue where to begin listening to the cassette tapes. Sometimes, I wonder if God is truly calling me to anything. Of course, I feel a strong "calling" to be the mom I am attempting to be (I really could improve in some areas of motherhood, like keeping a clean house and being a better example of organization, etc.). Is there something else for me?

Finally, today I just picked up a few cassettes and settled on Barbara Curtis's "Guaranteed Ways to Publish 50-100 Articles a Year," from a conference held in April of 2003. *Side-note: I had to think just now a bit about how the cassette player functioned. I paused, thinking I would lose my place..Oh yah!! Cassettes stop in place so I don't have to find my place again if I take the tape out to see the exact title, etc.* And yes, I had to go out and buy a boom box with a cassette player since I gave up on replacing them years ago, after my kiddos destroyed a couple. Do all kids think everything, related to money, grows on trees? Dare I say that God was the one working in the selection of the cassette tape? One tidbit of advice Ms. Curtis gave caused my heart to pound. The advice was to begin gathering information now, even if I don't know what God will "call" me to do later. That reminds me of Dr. Maria Montessori's life. Back in her day and country, women weren't supposed to have careers, but she really wanted to be a doctor, against her father's wishes. She did it anyway obviously, being the first woman in Italy to become a doctor. But then she had some twists and turns in her life that brought her back to a more feminine role - caring for young children, in an extraordinary way. So now I'm feeling pretty encouraged and inspired.

This reminds me of the whole concept that can sound like, "When I get married , I will change." Why wait?

Meditation

1 Samuel 30:6
David was greatly distressed because the men were talking of stoning him; each one was bitter in spirit because of his sons and daughters. But David found strength in the Lord his God."
**King James version says, "but David encouraged himself in the Lord." The Hebrew word used for strength/encouraged is "chazaq" which means to seize, be strong, CONQUER, aid, amend**

Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

1 Corinthians 1:9
God, who has called you into fellowship with his Son Jesus Christ our Lord, is faithful.

Galatians 1:6 & 7
I am astonished that you are so quickly deserting the one who called you by the grace of Christ and are turning to a different Gospel - which is really no gospel at all. Evidently some people are throwing you into confusion and are trying to pervert the gospel of Christ.

Galatians 5:13
You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love.

Ephesians 4:1 - 3
As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.

- Holy Bible, New International Version (NIV)

Appearances are Tricky

2010-07-26T18:41:00.000-07:00

Since I had nothing to do (ha!), I decided to venture into the deep abyss and check out what is new in the world of make-up. Jumping jacks!! Just as I thought, it was nothing more than a life changing experience. Those of you who have known me since way back in the day may recall that I used to go the whole nine yards, but in an understated way. Now, I don't think it's possible to go as far as Stephany did on my face. Would I really ever be the kind of person that uses eyebrow wax daily? Could I dig down deep inside and dab primer for every artistic expression on my happily naked countenance, especially priming for eye-shadow? Oh, and that gold creme eye-shadow, when would I ever wear that? The completed masterpiece was so beautiful and made me want to stare at myself and never wash my face again. Where is a photographer when you need one?! And this is exactly why I stopped fiddling with the cosmetic alterations. However, after having fun with Stephany's creativity and intoxicating exhilaration, I know I can possibly have a balanced relationship with cosmetics. I just may be the next NeNe or Kim.

Watching my girls be thrilled to be in that section of the store forces me to examine my own resolutions of "beauty." The rebel in me is determined to defy the worldly definition of "beauty," or more, the ridiculous insanity here in the United States of America, in relation to "image." What is the significance of what someone wore to the Grammies or Academy Awards? I really liked the swan suit Björk wore several years ago. Ever since then, I have not paid much attention.

It really ticked me off to see that the Broncos AND the Nuggets changed their uniform colors. I have been perturbed to see that the more modern female volleyball uniforms include shorts instead of briefs. In my opinion, I thought this should have happened a long time before I was humiliated wearing those dark blue briefs.

Seeing a photo of me in those 70s/80s short shorts with the white piping around the edges and up the side. Apparently my sophisticated mother thought this was not a wise fashion choice back then. I was a kid at the time, so it didn't occur to me to wear them with tights. The folks I saw wearing them back then wore them the same way I did. Fashion and appearance are not my hobbies, nor have they ever been.

So the whole issue of modesty has reared its' ugly head in my household. Do you adhere to the philosophy of "I did it, so I can't tell my kids not to do it?" What kind of logic is that? Only in the States. Not really!! That phrase can probably be translated. No matter what part of the world, that logic is way whack!! Hypothetically, if a person chooses to walk into a polar bear habitat at the zoo, and lives to tell about it, but looses a leg and 3 fingers, is it wrong of that person to advise others not to try it? Is it sane or insane for parents and teachers to suggest that children not make the same mistakes they have made? Is there a person that has ever lived who wished they had not practiced modesty? I can just imagine someone saying, "Boy, I wish I had worn that bustier with my tight cat suit, backwards of course, so that the bustier could show through. I wish I had worn that to the clubs and danced my tuckus off!! My life would be so much better! And the world would definitely most likely be a better place."

Ouch-sourced

2010-07-09T13:21:00.000-07:00

Have you seen "Outsourced," the movie? I am viewing it on DVD as I type this. I have a feeling that "Outsourced," the NBC sitcom coming this Fall, will be the catalyst to the next civil war in this country. Not too funny rubbing it in (no pun intended) that unemployment runs rampant here, while jobs with "American" companies are going to other countries due to cheaper labor costs, limited regulations, and incentives provided by other governments. Pretty soon, we'll have to go to other countries for medical treatment to keep costs down for the new government provided health care benefits. What do you think?

So Dirty...Needs Cleansing

2010-05-20T16:33:00.000-07:00

Who else is sickened by the condition of "corporate America?" What a shame! The demise of credibility and integrity in this country is resting on corporations unfortunately, and this concerns me, especially for the future of my children and my children's children.... Just a side note, it has bugged me to refer to the U.S.A. just by the name of the continents, America, which actually contains several other countries. Aren't Canadians also Americans? Wouldn't I be a United States citizen, or a U.S.A.-ian ?

With the thousands of barrels of oil spilling into the Gulf of Mexico, and leaving one corporation (I won't use any names BP, just so you know) to "fix" their mess, is unnerving. That mess, is not felt or comprehended currently by land locked folks, myself included, however, it will be felt soon, when our food supply is severely compromised. Also, the mess puts the environment in peril - all the animal life in that region, which will most likely reach across our planet. And now today the government is questioning the credibility of this corporation? How crazy!! That should have been in question once this accident occurred, and then, when they (BP) went to court to limit their own liability payout. Mega DUH!!!

Though I made a living in the insurance industry several years ago, I personally do not thrive in that environment. It mostly, as have other industries, been put under a fire, in order to make profits for stock holders. Social ethics (which companies have pushed aside increasingly, as their collective consciences decline into the murky abyss, where even that precious oil is reaching), will be virtually non-existent when the newest generation reaches adulthood, if we do nothing to drive our country into a more stable and distinguished position woven with probity.

How does a country attain such a position in the current global economy? In my fantasy country, all national debt would be eliminated, individual wealth would be built up, due to educated financial decisions based on financial advice from folks like Dave Ramsey for the individual and family finances, and trickling up to higher levels -ESPECIALLY IN GOVERNMENT. Then, it would be less commercial and corporate driven, with more citizens becoming self-reliant in growing and raising our own food, making their own clothing etc. and having a community that exchanges goods and services through smaller businesses. Where a hand shake means something, and a man's word is exactly what is spoken. Kind of like it was in the late 1800s to early 1900s without, of course, slavery, dishonesty, and greed. Or like when Joseph interpreted the king's dreams, and he devised a plan which would keep the country from struggling when famine hit - kind of like that. Maybe I should be Amish.

Watching the malarkey grow in commercialism is outrageous! There are so many advertisements for pharmaceuticals, for instance. With those advertisements, the warnings read like a science fiction novel. Take this and take the risk of losing your vital organs, because this is not really for humans! Though I appreciate all that medications do to alleviate pain and other ailments, I do not understand why not more is being done to research from where the increase in such diseases or disorders, as ADHD, Fibromyalgia, cancers, etc. are stemming. Another mega- DUH seems to be that the pesticides being used in our foods cause bad things to happen in the consumer. How too must preservatives, hormones, synthetic anything, etc. affect us? Our country barely has regulations on food products, so, how do we expect to get food from other countries, thanks to NAFTA and other trade agreements, which have none, or close to none enforcement of strict guidelines in what goes into the human food supply? Oh, and yes, I am not a big fan of NAFTA, even wrote a college paper on the subject, many moons ago.

Completely off the subject (or is it?), today, I had a difficult time shaking this question: If someone in a social network refuses to interact with certain others, outside of that arena, how should that be interpreted, and what kind of legacy does this leave to future generations? For instance, say you decide to join a tennis club. You meet people you wish to get to know more authentically outside of that way of meeting. When you ask another person to go, for example, have a diet soda and talk, they say they would prefer to only see you at the tennis club (not due to B.O., bad breath, or anything that you can change about yourself). Then you find that other folks within this group are communicating - verbally or non-verbally - the same message, how would you feel and what would you do? How "should" a Christian respond, or, try to make things right? How should church-ianity change in that type of human interaction, following God's commandment to love others and love Him?

Ultimately, I know that God is in control and that I should not worry about things I cannot control. Habakkuk pleads with God in Habakkuk 1:2 -4 says, "How long, O Lord, must I call for help, but you do not listen? Or cry out to you, 'Violence!' but you do not save? Why do you make me look at injustice? Why do you tolerate wrong? Destruction and violence are before me; there is strife, and conflict abounds. Therefore the law is paralyzed, and justice never prevails. The wicked hem in the righteous, so that justice is perverted." (NIV) The Lord answers him, and in vs 5 says "Look at the nations and watch - and be utterly amazed. For I am going to do something in your days that you would not believe, even if you were told."

Then in a word study, I look for "hope," and find the following:

Psalm 25:3, "No one whose hope is in you will ever be put to shame, but they will be put to shame who are treacherous without excuse."

Psalm 42:5, "Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God."

Proverbs 13:12, "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life."

Romans 5:1 - 6 "Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly." (NIV)

And there is so much more written for our spiritual edification. Keep on hoping!!

A good friend recently said something like, we are made to hope. As Christians, we put our hope in what is unseen, so that all these trials and wicked happenings around us, including disease, destruction, greed, dis-unification, etc., though not caused by the One we serve, strengthen us causing us to look forward to God's perfect plan for His people.

*Satelite pictures from National Geographic.

Stewardship

2010-05-06T22:52:00.000-07:00

Pictures can be pretty powerful. There are certain images that just intrigue me. A picture of a hand or a group of hands. Pictures of flowers and their ethereal charm. Historic photographs of people and their mode of transportation, especially airplanes. Photographs of ancestors, and other people's families. Oceanography.

I have seen a few images, within the past week, that have taken me aback. Certain people's smiles. I am unaware of what the connection could be, but those smiles just lift my spirit, almost like hearing the sound of a child's laughter. My cousin, whom I thought was mysteriously gone forever, has ventured back into a realm where I can enjoy him as an adult. Previous to this, I had only seen him maybe once a year as a child. But to know now that he is still walking this Earth, is an amazing phenomenon to me. His smile causes me to contentedly pause.

"Mad Men" somehow got on my request list from the library. Went through all three seasons. Capitalism! Don't get me started! There were some scenes that caused me to gasp, and then realize, oh yeah, that was a different time. Family picnic, and leaving the trash on the ground. Mom telling her children to go watch T.V., not really monitoring the content, nor discussing what may have been viewed and the not-so-logical conclusions a child would draw from what was seen, yada yada yada.

Another image struck me like a foreign sensation, where I wondered what could be behind the intensity. Kind of like how I refilled my wand lighter today, and some of the contents of the can got on my fingers. That caused them to feel cold, like dry ice, and I just stood there and looked at my hand for a lingering moment. What does it mean when we encounter someone and we feel an immediate connection and kinship? Is it just plain attraction? What if it happens every time you are in that person's presence? Doesn't attraction fade, at least superficial attraction, based on appearance or the initial encounter, not based on knowing a person at all? I searched that picture for clues as to who the person is?

During some research, I came across a video clip which ripped a piece of me out. The same thing happened when I was watching a clip of "The Cove." I adore dolphins and the mystery behind such an intelligent, free, wild creature, which makes me feel protective of them. Even though I know that no matter what men do on this planet, God's will will be done, I still feel like it is so wrong, what the Japanese do to these animals.

That childhood song, "Oh be careful little eyes what you see, oh be careful little eyes what you see, For the Father up above, is looking down in love, so be careful little eyes what you see".... keeps coming to mind. Anything we consume through all of our sensory receptors, is ingested and becomes part of us. Sometimes, what we take into our bodies has to be digested in some way. It's been my thinking that everything we take in, has to come out somehow.

This week, I was wondering if there is a way to turn things around? Is it possible for folks to take a step back and say, "This is not right. We have been making the mistake of doing this, when it should not be done. Let's turn this bus around!" Is it possible for a nation to take a step back and say, there is no way we are giving up the principles on which our country was founded, minus the racism/slavery and the way Native Americans were treated? Can pornography be destroyed, to be no more? Can we throw out NAFTA?

There's a family I once knew, and admired. They were so conscientious about what they ate, and what their young children ate. Me, I was raised on Kellogg's Corn Flakes, Wheaties, Coke Cola and Ding Dongs. And now I find myself trying to teach my children that eating is part of fueling our bodies, and not for us to put things in that do not necessarily contribute well to our health. Complex carbohydrates, lean proteins, natural ingredients, nothing fried, nothing with ingredients we cannot pronounce or know what it is, etc....yeah right!! The big challenge is teaching kids to stop eating when they are full so they don't become over-eaters, when I was taught to eat everything on my plate. Another challenge for a girl who tried every candy or food that was new on the shelves of the super market, is to "refocus" while shopping. For example, looking for new vegetables or fruits I've never tried, rather than going to the candy aisle to see what's new.

Good stewardship. It seems that this concept is not a popular one these days. But it has been my desire lately to try and take care of what I have. To get back to basics and remember that everything I have is God's, including this body, a temple...a broken down one at that. Time to renovate! Only, I have no clue where to get new parts!!

No place like home!

2010-04-14T13:13:00.001-07:00

One day we were out, and it seemed as though we kept bumping into people we knew at every turn. It is fun to be able to fellowship while running errands. On the way home, feeling content and loved, one child blurted out, "See Mom, you have lots of friends. Forget about the stuck-up people."

They have witnessed the pain I have felt in being rejected by certain folks. I found it funny that I needed this reminder. Especially since I keep telling them basically the same thing. You are so loved. Sometimes, we want so much to be liked, and feel awful when certain folks reject us. A friend of mine was telling me this same message several weeks ago, but I had not let it sink in as much as I did the message from my child.

This also got me thinking about where I call "home." I have settled in, in places where that rejection dwells. Then I think of people who do not attend "church" because of flaws like this. To us, I say, that no "church" is perfect, because it is made up of imperfect folks, just like us. Those places are not truly a "home." Thank God, people who have accepted Jesus the Christ as Lord and Savior, have an eternal home to which we look forward. All the pains of this worldly existence will end, when we go home.

Psalm 84:3 & 4 "Even the sparrow has found a home, and the swallow a nest for herself, where she may have her young - a place near your altar, O Lord Almighty, my King and my God. Blessed are those who dwell in your house; they are ever praising you. Selah"

John 14:23 "Jesus replied, 'If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him. He who does not love me will not obey my teaching. These words you hear are not my own; they belong to the Father who sent me.'"

Should I Get Tatted?

2010-04-08T19:37:00.000-07:00

Leviticus 19:28 says, "Do not cut your bodies for the dead or put tattoo marks on yourselves. I am the Lord."

Call me old fashioned, but whenever I see a baby with her ears pierced, I wonder about the individual child having their choice taken away in altering her body that way. A few days ago, a child, barely able to walk, approached me with both ears pierced. I asked the older child who chased after her how old the baby was. Then I felt the need to back pedal a little, since there was hesitation on the older child's face. Surely the baby was a "she?" But no, she corrected me and said it was a "he." If you are confused, I was also confused by the encounter. That question is climbing the charts, almost right up there with the one that goes like, "When are you due?" And the man's not pregnant.

Shouldn't a child have the choice to pierce their own ear(s)? I have encountered this same type of matter about my own children and whether to chemically treat their hair, etc. It's their body, I feel, and they should make a responsible decision in altering it. I feel it is my duty to help them accept their natural selves as beautiful - beauty coming from the inside out. I wonder, if I had a son, how would this apply to circumcision? What a complicated matter. Or if they had been born with some abnormal condition where I needed to make a choice of how to make the child's body and life more adaptable to our world, what would I do? What a challenge some parents face. Then there are the decisions in getting a child vaccinated. That too, to me, fits in this category in question.

I have considered getting a tattoo for many years, off and on (no, not the rub on kind). A design I considered a LONG LONG time ago, was a Hershey's Kiss on the derrierre with the white flag reading "kiss my...." I still think of having one of my scars incorporated into a beautiful butterfly. One of my favorite reality shows lately has been "L.A. Ink" - not only seeing the artists at work and the reasoning behind some of the choices people make in getting tatted up, but also the cool artwork. One of my chosen subjects in college Speech, was body art, including piercings, etc. I appreciate this form of self expression.

A beautiful friend pointed to the above verse. That verse adds another thing to consider. Though I know we are not under law, but under grace, as Christians, I wonder what place the "law" takes in our everyday lives. For example, the subject of Christmas trees in relation to Jeremiah, chapter ten. Knowing that something offended our God in past dispensations causes me to wonder if we should heed the law out of love of God, and wanting the best that life has to offer us? After all the mistakes I have made as an adult, I have come to realize that the "law" is not the kind of thing that is like an adult authority over an adolescent, where we feel the need to rebel against that authority. Instead, it is more the loving suggestion on how to live on this planet and receive the blessings God has for us.

God judges the heart; the acceptance, or rejection of Him, and the motives that aren't seen with the naked eye. So then how do we know for ourselves that we have what needs to be in our heart when making choices, and know that we are honoring God? Is this a WWJD (what would Jesus do) question?

Psalm chapter 119 verse nine says, "How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word." Then verse 11 says,"Thy word have I hid in my heart, that I may not sin against Thee." Ephesians chapter six verse 17 says, "Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God."

Oh, and then Paul goes on to say in verses 18 through 20, "And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints. Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should." That's a lot of praying!! Okay, so then there is prayer. Reading His word is "hearing" His side of conversation with us, and then having the discipline of prayer is our side of conversation with Him.

Is that it? What are your thoughts?

If....

2010-03-20T01:50:00.000-07:00

This week, I was delighted to attend a Bible study. The group is studying Ephesians. Some thing was said that got me thinking about so-called "agnostic" or "atheist." Now I need to do some research to see if there is a word for not believing someone is an "agnostic" or "atheist?" I ain't buying it any more!! Every single person able to live at least a minute knows that God exists. Even rocks know this.

I had a conversation once with someone who said something like, "If there is a God, then how can he reject someone and let them go to Hell?"

That question seems pretty ridiculous to me. It's like saying, "If she was my mother, then why did she burn my eggs at least once a year until I was 42?" You know that woman is your mother!! You do not remember her giving birth to you, or maybe even the moment she decided to adopt you, but you know that woman is your mom! The question is: Why did you not learn to cook your own eggs?

Just because you wonder "if...," this does not mean that there is no God. It just means you do not understand things that you see, or do not see.

Hebrews 11:1 says, "Faith is being sure of what we hope for, and certain of what we do not see."

Wonder in the Everlasting Beauty of God

2010-03-12T16:06:00.000-08:00

Every time I get online at the library, the screen is distorted. To top it off, when I ask anyone, other than my kids, if they see what I see, they say something like, "Looks fine to me." AAAAAGH!!! Thank God for laptops and wireless internet...at home. Though it smells like stinky feet in here, what a thrill to have a laptop. And no, we have not located the source of the smell yet.

We are learning about mutualism, parasites, consumerism, and commensalism, in science . I do not recall having this much fun with science in elementary school. I don't remember learning this stuff at all. Commensalism is something like marriage, right?

Today, looking at the mountains, I couldn't help but think of what is beyond...California. It would be so awesome to see the ocean. I want to go to there!!! But, I am still able to see the beauty of the mountains and appreciate living here in Colorado. It is so important to stop and smell the roses. To appreciate what and who is around me is part of my "duty." Isn't that part of loving God and enjoying Him?

Challenge: Seek God's beauty, and you will find it. In Matthew 7:7, Jesus says, "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you." (NIV) This isn't a verse introducing the ATM, immediate gratification way of living and trying to get rich, or anything like that. God is merciful. Though there is ugliness all around, no thanks to the father of lies, God's beauty remains. "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." - Romans 8:28 (NIV)

The song that has been resonating with me lately is "From the Inside Out" recorded by Hillsong United (2006), also performed by Seventh Day Slumber (2009). Here are the words:

A thousand times I've failed
Still your mercy remains
And should I stumble again
Still I'm caught in your grace

Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame
my heart and my soul, Lord I give you control
Consume me from the inside out Lord
Let justice and praise become my embrace
To love You from the inside out

Your will above all else, my purpose remains
The art of losing myself in bringing you praise

Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame
In my heart, in my soul, Lord I give you control
Consume me from the inside out Lord
Let justice and praise become my embrace
To love You from the inside out

Chorus 2x
Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame
And the cry of my heart is to bring You praise
From the inside out Lord, my soul cries out

Clutter Garden

2010-02-17T02:39:00.000-08:00

It has been driving me nuts lately. The clutter around here is very distracting and aggravating. I used to be a neat freak (yes Mom, there was a time when I actually threw things out) , but after having children who also acquired "stuff," there was a necessity to let things slide and to re-prioritize.

So now, I have committed to spending at least ten minutes a day de-cluttering. If only we had more space, there would be more room to put everything! Our home would be swimming with more floor space and carpet angels in every room.

Being "arts and crafts" minded causes some of the problem. There are a lot of things I have not gotten around to using yet, or have not worked on in a while, for lack of work space. The scrapbooks I planned to give my children when they grow up, need updating - there are over eight photo boxes of photos to go through dating back to 1999.

Recently, I just felt the need to buy some pastels and looked forward to experimenting with them. So on top of wanting to prune the excess, I want to exercise my right brain. The left side must be totally buff.

Surrender

2010-02-10T21:40:00.000-08:00

Waking from anesthesia, a sense of relief spread through my broken body. My surgeon explained the limitations very clearly, but what is life without the ability to bend, lift and twist? Who knew that having a bad reaction to anesthesia meant vomiting constantly, and when vomiting, most civilized and uncivilized folks bend over. Ah, and there is the word “bend.” So when we take that out of the equation, that changes things. So on top of rejoicing because I made it through the surgery, I needed to re-learn pretty much all the processes I used constantly, which included the bending, lifting and twisting.

A week later, a visit to the emergency room turned into some time in ICU due to a pulmonary embolism. The woman I had become, who tried to line up everything in life in a way that made sense, suddenly was thrust before her Maker begging for her life, having to let go of the things held dear and face the possibility of leaving a mess behind. Though it is in my nature to negotiate and panic when things are going awry, the Holy Spirit most certainly was working in me and gave me a peace I had not known before, with no urges to bargain. This situation forced me to surrender everything, including this body, and hang on to the one thing that matters - God wants us to come to Him through Jesus Christ to enjoy and share the amazing love He has for us. Trust God and love others, the rest works out.

A Sign

2010-02-08T22:22:00.000-08:00

As we descended the stairs, I contemplated turning back to the warmth inside. Once at the car, I unlocked the driver side door, threw my purse in, and pressed the button to unlock the other doors. While waiting for my children to open their car doors, I tried to prepare myself for folding myself - my aged, stiff body - into the cold seat. But the other doors would not open. They were frozen shut. Something leapt within me...YAY!!! We can go back into the warmth and I can put my comfy lounge-wear on. Then, no! This could not be a sign, could it? I really wanted to see the folks I had thought about seeing for about a week now. There was a new person I was looking forward to seeing and officially meeting. It would be so bad of me to not go after saying that I would be there. Suggesting the most muddy option - and the thought of mud being smudged into my seat, almost caused me to re-neg - the children climbed over my seat into the back. Plopping into my seat and starting the engine, I could not believe I didn't suggest the option earlier.

What was the fear, or hesitation, reluctance (both nice words for "fear") about? Was getting a mud streak on my pants really all that bad? Was it worth the anxiety of making a good impression and showing up in a clean, put-together way, though I was running late? Isn't it funny how things go when we become parents? Life doesn't always go the "right" way, nor the way we know it would have if we were single and childless. But, with children, things certainly become a lot more interesting. With another person to share things with, things become more messy, and maybe even a little more spicy. Thank God for relationships and the amazing gift of being a parent!!

That's Entertainment

2010-01-31T22:17:00.000-08:00

Can I blame it on ADD when it comes to award shows? Just can't help myself, but I get really bored with the bleeping/editing, finding it sad that it is necessary. It is hard for me to sit still not being able to relax and enjoy what could be a relaxing celebration. Yet I find myself wanting to see certain performances. Caught part of Mary J. Blige and Andrea Bocelli (enjoy them both). Curious about Travis Barker's performance with Eminem, Lil' Wayne & Drake...but gave up .

Then there's the ridiculous previews of movies, supposedly approved for ALL audiences. No really? Since when are those way too realistic special effects suitable for my four year old. Like the werewolf movie coming out and then there is another one but I don't recall the name of it because I keep having to change the channel since it creeps, even me, out.

Yet, I find it odd that the b-word has found its way into prime time programming, and now the a-word is joining the allowed profanity. Just a matter of time before the other words are found in the realm of family entertainment.

So what are we leaving for future generations in this "anything goes" world?

Epiphany

2010-01-22T13:13:00.000-08:00

1 Corinthians 2:4 & 5 "My message and my preaching were not with wise and persuasive words, but with a demonstration of the Spirit's power, so that your faith might not rest on men's wisdom, but on God's power." NIV

It's funny what a stint in the ICU will do to a perspective. Making it out of that place can be life changing. I guess it is life changing making it out in whatever state ensues. For me, it was truly an epiphany. For so long I was pretty secure in knowing that I could bring about an outcome on my own. In retrospect, I know my rational was ludicrous, but now it is so apparent that my power is nothing compared to God's power. There is no way I can manipulate any outcome in my own life, without the power of the Spirit being prevalent in my life. Now my quest is to allow the Holy Spirit to work more in me. What a challenge when curve balls keep coming my way. But then again, it is pretty easy to surrender knowing there is only one thing I can control - how I love is the one thing I need to exercise. My writer's brain, music, card making, getting healthier, etc. are all things that can be a product of the love exercise.