Clutter Garden

It has been driving me nuts lately. The clutter around here is very distracting and aggravating. I used to be a neat freak (yes Mom, there was a time when I actually threw things out) , but after having children who also acquired "stuff," there was a necessity to let things slide and to re-prioritize.

So now, I have committed to spending at least ten minutes a day de-cluttering. If only we had more space, there would be more room to put everything! Our home would be swimming with more floor space and carpet angels in every room.

Being "arts and crafts" minded causes some of the problem. There are a lot of things I have not gotten around to using yet, or have not worked on in a while, for lack of work space. The scrapbooks I planned to give my children when they grow up, need updating - there are over eight photo boxes of photos to go through dating back to 1999.

Recently, I just felt the need to buy some pastels and looked forward to experimenting with them. So on top of wanting to prune the excess, I want to exercise my right brain. The left side must be totally buff.

Surrender

Waking from anesthesia, a sense of relief spread through my broken body. My surgeon explained the limitations very clearly, but what is life without the ability to bend, lift and twist? Who knew that having a bad reaction to anesthesia meant vomiting constantly, and when vomiting, most civilized and uncivilized folks bend over. Ah, and there is the word “bend.” So when we take that out of the equation, that changes things. So on top of rejoicing because I made it through the surgery, I needed to re-learn pretty much all the processes I used constantly, which included the bending, lifting and twisting.

A week later, a visit to the emergency room turned into some time in ICU due to a pulmonary embolism. The woman I had become, who tried to line up everything in life in a way that made sense, suddenly was thrust before her Maker begging for her life, having to let go of the things held dear and face the possibility of leaving a mess behind. Though it is in my nature to negotiate and panic when things are going awry, the Holy Spirit most certainly was working in me and gave me a peace I had not known before, with no urges to bargain. This situation forced me to surrender everything, including this body, and hang on to the one thing that matters - God wants us to come to Him through Jesus Christ to enjoy and share the amazing love He has for us. Trust God and love others, the rest works out.

A Sign

As we descended the stairs, I contemplated turning back to the warmth inside. Once at the car, I unlocked the driver side door, threw my purse in, and pressed the button to unlock the other doors. While waiting for my children to open their car doors, I tried to prepare myself for folding myself - my aged, stiff body - into the cold seat. But the other doors would not open. They were frozen shut. Something leapt within me...YAY!!! We can go back into the warmth and I can put my comfy lounge-wear on. Then, no! This could not be a sign, could it? I really wanted to see the folks I had thought about seeing for about a week now. There was a new person I was looking forward to seeing and officially meeting. It would be so bad of me to not go after saying that I would be there. Suggesting the most muddy option - and the thought of mud being smudged into my seat, almost caused me to re-neg - the children climbed over my seat into the back. Plopping into my seat and starting the engine, I could not believe I didn't suggest the option earlier.

What was the fear, or hesitation, reluctance (both nice words for "fear") about? Was getting a mud streak on my pants really all that bad? Was it worth the anxiety of making a good impression and showing up in a clean, put-together way, though I was running late? Isn't it funny how things go when we become parents? Life doesn't always go the "right" way, nor the way we know it would have if we were single and childless. But, with children, things certainly become a lot more interesting. With another person to share things with, things become more messy, and maybe even a little more spicy. Thank God for relationships and the amazing gift of being a parent!!